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Today I feel like a pregnant hormonal woman.
It's true. Lately I feel like I'm pregnant. And no, I'm not announcing that I am pregnant or anything, I am just "feeling" like I am.
This adoption process is taking a toll on me and it's getting really long. I have all the "extra" emotions that I did when I was pregnant with J. Minus the stretch marks and belly. (okay whose kidding who.....I do have stretch marks, and I do have a belly...so scratch that.)
I am short with the one's I love, bawling over teenie bopper movie, starting to get into the "nesting" stage (which, by the way, is not going real well when you don't have a functional basement to put all the stuff that is suppose to go in the basement.) I am frustrated that I can't get the room that is suppose to be Nevaeh's cleaned out. We are waiting until we officially pass court to start decorating her room, but still, it needs to be clean before we can even start to decorate it.
I am totally overwhelmed right now with it all. I am starting to worry about the bonding we will have with Nev. What if she cries and cries when we meet her, because we are total strangers to her. What about the 12 hour straight plane trip. How will I react to being a parent of a baby again, when I am so comfortable with the stage that J is at. I don't deal well with not sleeping(okay all who know me well, understand that is an understatement!!) and what if I hit the "wall" I hit with Jayden and get the blue's again. (again "the blues" is a major understatement.) How will I spread my time between two children when one needs me, but so does the other.
I am so tired of waiting, it feels like I am 42 weeks pregnant...WAY overdue. Actually, technically I am 82 weeks overdue. (2 years and 4 month =122 weeks - 40 weeks(normal pregnancy)=82 weeks OVERDUE. No wonder I have a few stretch marks and a belly.
See, I told you I feel like a pregnant hormonal woman today. And for the last weeks. Someone who has been there done that...please tell me it will get better. Oh....and book Molly Maid for me.....
For like a week straight.
14 comments:
Wow, I didn't think there was anyone out there that had waited longer than me! You have waited 2 more weeks! I hope you hear good news soon. As to your post, all I can say is that I understand the crazy hormones. I'm feeling a bit strange myself!
IMO learning to deal with two kids who need you at once just happens. You will work it out and all will be well~ :)
I hope you start feeling better and that things progress quickly with the court date!
I haven't been there, done that, but I know that you're not alone. 82 weeks overdue - you deserve an award just for getting out of bed! I hope that you hear good news very soon so that you can start decorating Nev's room:)
P.S. I hear chocolate is really good when you're prego;)
Hi Krista. It's Steph, that random chick you're friends with on facebook. I feel for you! Waiting sucks like crazy. I can only hope that your process goes smoothly and you can keep busy in the mean time. Waiting for an adoption weathers a special kind of patience into adoptive parents that most other people will never have. Even after you have your new addition home, you'll find the world kind of slows down and you can use that to see things with a more relaxed point of view and can enjoy your kids even more! I wish you guys the best. Blessings!!
Oh my I hear you... Our house is a disaster as I try to pack, organize clothes, guess what clothes will fit and wait for those visas to get issued already!!! I hope to send some kisses to your little girl very very soon!!! ;-)
Ramona
The weight of the wait is just too much...
Who knows where to download XRumer 5.0 Palladium?
Help, please. All recommend this program to effectively advertise on the Internet, this is the best program!
Panic mode is soooo normal in this. Wait till you get that news that court passed, the room is cleaned out easy peasy, decorating begins, packing is started. It'll be so good to be able to breath after court!
I am right there with you..except add in we still haven't heard about a court date..sometime next week now!
AAAAAAAAAARRRGGHHHHHHHHH!!!!
I am right there with you..except add in we still haven't heard about a court date..sometime next week now!
AAAAAAAAAARRRGGHHHHHHHHH!!!!
82 weeks justifies you to be a complete hormonal, blubbering mess!
But yeah - been there, done that, and you'll get through. It will be an adjustment at first but you'll manage and before you know it, you'll hardly remember your life as the mommy of just one.
P.S. one thing that you can do right now to reduce the chances that you will get the post adoption "blues" is not to put so much pressure on yourself (so relax and call that maid service!)
You'll do great!
I hear you! Nothing easy about this kind of journey. Just little bits each day...and finally one day you'll wake up with your new little one and be like "It feels 'normal' again!". Could take weeks, months but it will all be okay.
Can't wait to check back and see how court went!!
Take care,
Tammy
PEI
I think what you're feeling is totally normal. We don't even have a referral and I feel like that sometimes. How will we fit it all in? Breathe in, breathe out...
Here's to successful court on the 5th.
Thinkging of you...
Heidi
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